This is going to be a long journey for me, “Fear of Success” and overcoming it. I have a fear of success; a fear of reaching my potential perhaps. To admit even more of my truth, the root cause is I feel undeserving of it. There I said it out loud. The question I pose to myself is how can I feel undeserving of what I work my ass off for? I don’t ask for help because I don’t want to owe anyone anything. I think I feel like I need to earn “it” and the harder the grind the more I will "feel" deserving of it. I’m not sure it’s working though. I had to admit to myself the other day I intentionally stalled during the SwapTRAP journey because I realized the potential of it…fear of success.
“If I do this, it may become too much of a success too soon”; these are my thoughts constantly. I now recognize this. I have no idea of how I will overcome this. I was thinking the other day; maybe this is Gods way of keeping me humble. And who am I to interfere with his work trying to overcome it. My husband is really the only person that knows how deep this goes, and he speaks against these thoughts constantly because he witnesses my work ethic first hand, and it is him constantly reminding me “Babe NO ONE gave you anything, you have earned everything you have”. This blog was step one, admitting I have a problem. I have no idea how to overcome this mindset, like I said it’s a journey, and I know I’m not alone, so I will share as I go, in hopes of encouraging someone else out there that is in pursuit of their full potential. Watch me grow Fam!
Thank you for your support…turnfitvibes, it’s a thing!
Shonte Turner/IFBB pro and creator of the SwapTrap and Yo Trap.